The Online Diary

Its About Me

2009-07-12T09:25:00.001-07:00

I truly believe the answer to the problem is not in "them." The answer to the problem is in "me." I can only control what I do. I can't control my wife, my children, my pastor, my neighbor or anyone else. But, I have complete control of me.

If I humble myself, pray and seek God's face, and turn from my evil ways, then God will hear from heaven, forgive my sins and heal my land. If I present my body as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God; this is my spiritual worship. If I will not be conformed to this age, but be transformed by the renewing of my mind, then I may discern what is the good, pleasing, and perfect will of God. Nothing will happen in my church collectively, if it doesn't begin in me individually.

High Above Me

2009-05-22T20:20:00.001-07:00

High Above Me, originally uploaded by info.addu.

I believe in my heart and soul that we were meant to be with one another. I think about you everyday and night. When I am with you you light up my life. You are the best thing that has ever happened to me and I wish upon a star for you to return back by my side. The love that I hold for you in my soul is greater than an ocean or the sky above. Please forgive me for all the hurt that I have caused you. Please, I beg of you to forgive me and return back by my side like the way that it was meant to be. I love you, and I always will until the day that I die. Hopefully, when that day comes, I will still have you by my side and you will be the last angel face that I see. I will be able to hold you in my arms one last time, and tell you how much I love you and how much you really mean to me. I love you!!

So Much More to Tell

2009-05-04T04:11:00.000-07:00

There is so much to say, but haven’t got enough words to utter all these just at one time. So hope fully you may require reading your emails on a daily basis. So at least you will have an idea of the pain you have given to someone, People say “deceiver will never achieve happiness” but it’s not very true. Most of the times, deceivers are the happiest. I do not need to give an example; you are the best.
Life has given you many ways to live, as a human being you could not keep the promises you made to your own self. I don’t give a damn about those, but I am so pissed off to know that I am still in thoughts of yours, and its really driving me nuts. Sweet! I have given you the best of my life, and you shattered all broke my heart.
I wonder how you could forget my love that had to last for eternity has just swap to someone else. Ew, Moreover to the one who you used to hate most..! ;-). Who had promised to fuck your mom.

I am picking up the pieces of my broken heart, since the day you stepped out. But still I am missing a quarter of it. Maybe its all gone back those days, to a point of no return. I have loved you in all the ways that I could, and you knew it very well that I was about to sacrifice my life for you. It was just lacking an order from you. I wonder why you are killing me softly. Why haven’t you just asked me to die, I would have died infront of you. But I am glad that you never asked. At least I could see you smiling, though its not for me.
Do you remember the day, when I was on sick bed infron of you? Hopefully you do
“the moment I saw you I did not know what had gone in my thoughts, my heart started pounding beats unconditionally. And your unintentional touch on my hand had frozen me. I was never to see you. I just had only few of my energy to save my tears. I was wishing soon you to leave. But I still can remember that day. I felt like that you were in severing pain, you wanted to share a bit with me. Maybe I was wrong maybe I could be perfectly right.”
The damage you caused to my life is nothing compared to the love that I have given you without any complain, never asked for anything more, just wanted to spend the rest of my life with that was the only wish of mine. For your happiness I have sacrificed the best of my life and fought against the whole, thinking that you will never leave me. And I was so proud when you promised me that you will never leave me. I just could not believe that, but my love bygone the doubts.

To Be Continued

An Introduction to My Diary

2009-05-04T04:03:00.000-07:00

As this blog is highly intended to write about my personal life. But has not yet updated a single word about myself. So I just wanted to let you all know the starting from today, you may require reading this blog on a daily basis. As some of my articles would be pending and blah blah, just let me know. Your feeds back would be highly appreciated.

Thanks you very much in advance.

Missing You

2009-04-18T04:16:00.001-07:00

I'm missing you like crazy
I think I'm going mad
I simply can't stop thinking
of the special times we had.

Each moment lasts an hour
Each hour lasts a day
The clock is ticking slowly
Just because you went away.

I need you here beside me
I just want to see your face
To feel your precious heartbeat
And be lost in your embrace.

I gaze out of the window
And look up at the moon
I play the waiting Game
And pray you'll be here soon.

They say hope springs eternal
Well I only hope it's true
For I can't bare the emptiness
That comes from missing you.

Eternal Love

2009-04-18T04:12:00.001-07:00

I wonder if I dreamed of you-
if you would appear?
To make my nights full of love,
and always hold me near.

I wonder if I thought of you-
if you would feel it in your soul?
Like two spirits in the universe,
who always seem to know.

Even if the stars went black
and the sun were to shine no more.
They could find their way to each other,
no matter how far the shore.

Safely in each others arms,
to bid the rest of time.
Finding Eternal Love
so many seek to find.

Caring for each other
through the worst of storms.
Leaning on the arms of love
and never need anymore.

This is how I feel for you,
I've known it all along.
You are my one true love
My world.. My heart.. My soul!